Really needing some down time right now, but I guess it won't come until Sunday. Just a lot on my mind. It's true we have been busy and I'm very tired, have not had enough rest or sleep and I do not function as well and get frustrated more easily under these conditions.
Eventually I will share some pics of the week, but I'm not in the mood this morning. Yesterday as the rain moved in, so did my *mood*. Only when the rain moved out, my *mood* stayed. I know I'm tired but sometimes when you are tired you can learn new things that on a normal day you just accept and move on.
While there are several things bothering me, most of which I won't blog about here, I can and will say the following:
1. I don't like limbotic situations. It makes you feel like you are stuck in a time warp somewhere between present and future.
2. I become impatient waiting on other people, especially when it is in a perpetual state of waiting. Some of us are aging here as we speak! (my blue linoleum, remaining old kitchen appliances, and several other things come to mind). ;-)
3. Not having the power to fix problems beyond my control in certain situations, whether family or in other settings.
4. Not having clear expectations or feedback from other people in my world, leaving me to wonder and have an imagination that is most likely fiction.
5. Lack of information and being kept in the dark is not something that I favor in my personal life nor in a working situation. It creates deep chasms, lack of trust, lack of loyalty, and probably most crippling of all, uncertainty. While some think that is a good thing, I believe they are wrong and that it will bite their big rear in a karmatic situation later on. :-O
6. Not having a say, or being asked your opinion, makes one feel unappreciated, undeserving, and a cast off - regardless if it is a marriage, a friendship, or in a work setting.
7. Inconsistency or double standards gets to me. I'm not sure why I feel a need for everything in life to make sense, but if given a reason on one day, it should match the same scenario on the next day. If you don't like raisins today, then why are you eating them tomorrow?
8. Unfairness. My Dad told me the world was unfair. But I've never stopped trying to make it fair. I've never given up hope. And I read "The Book" so I know how it all ends. Fair wins in the end. Goodness prevails. Knowing this little detail helps but the current world sure can be irritating.
9. Unacceptance. No explanations required.
10. Surely I can think of one more thing that irritates and bothers me to make it round off in an even 10! Ok Fast Food services getting my order wrong every single dang time? What is UP with that? Such a small detail in life, but dang it - if it's such a small detail, why can't they get it right? If I say "fried chicken salad" then why are you bringing me grilled? Arghhhhhhh!
Anyway, I guess these things are the gist of what is bothering me right now. They are magnified by the fact that I am tired and need some down time. But it is in these times, which seem to be muddled, that in the chaos, you clearly see the things that make you so frustrated. Enough that you can list them and analyze them. And being true to the tune of myself, I naturally want to try and fix those things. And that is where I am right now.