Sunday, September 30, 2018

A Fall Walk, Buying Smaller Sizes, and The Business

We went for our walk yesterday and I did not get any pictures.  I did a LIVE on Facebook but have nothing to show for it in pics.  Guess I was just in the moment.  

We went to run some errands afterwards.  I had suggested Good Will and George suggested Bargain Hunt.  And we did a couple of other errands.  

I found some jean leggings and some brand new with tag (really cute) winter gym pants.  The fat is coming off and more muscle being built.  I keep hovering around the same weight but I'm losing inches I think and muscle weighs more.  They say you can't tell by the weight.  And I have not been good at measuring but of course you have to at the end of the next challenge, so I'll know soon.  

At Bargain Hunt I found new with tags jeans to wear for the winter.  So I'm so happy!  I'm set pretty good now I think.  It's possible I may need some khaki pants that fit better or I can try to shrink mine but I think I've already tried that.  I guess when we Christmas shop I'll try to find those.  I'm good with black pants and with jeans now anyway.   

We came home and the doggies were glad to see us.  They did not get to do the walk with us.  "No pets".  

Of course we had been running around all morning and walked probably close to 3 miles or more with shopping included so my legs were tired.  I opted to sit and watch a couple of YouTube's for an hour or so.  Then back up and at it.  

I bought several baskets and Containers at Good Will and so I changed the way I had my makeup in the bathroom.  I did a little bit of laundry but had kept up with it all week so had minimal to do yesterday.  Changed the sheets, put up my new $20 coat from last week's Bargain Hunt purchase in Hendersonville. And I read a bit and sipped some wine, while dinner was getting ready.  

George is getting good at fixing fish.  He fixed Cobia that he had obtained from Houston's butcher shop.  He also has a seafood freezer.  It was a big fish in our freezer.  

The couscous was amazing.  It had a bit of vinegar and oil in it so it was more like a salad.  He tossed in some fresh herbs and some carrots.  Also had some cheese in there.  The cheese was chunks (not melted) like feta but it was not feta.  It was really good.  The baked beans were not the best compliment to a fish dish but they were really good.  The frozen green beans is what I would have fixed with it.  I think George forgets about our frozen veggies sometimes as they are usually in the kitchen freezer instead of our meat freezer in the laundry room.  But an excellent dinner.

All day yesterday I kept thinking about us being in our RV and touring around.  I want that life so bad for us.  I really don't want to wait.  I want to go now while our health is good.  Right now I'd sell everything, buy an RV - we can do consulting work on the go.  And travel til we get tired of it.  Then settle wherever we wanted.  However, that is not what we'd do.  We'd have to have to sell this house, find a small place somewhere for the storage of simple things we'd want to keep.  And have a home base.  But anyway, I just can't stop thinking about it.  It won't go away.  As I shop I'm already shopping for the RV I don't have.  "Those plates would be great for the RV"  - "That strainer that closes in and lays flat will be great for the RV".  That basket, that container.  Looking in my closet I'm thinking of which clothes would be going and which would not.  I'm so obsessed with this.   I don't know when, but I want it to happen.  I see us and the dogs getting set up in our camp and then heading out for a walk and then coming back and going into town with dogs in tow and scouting out the place.  We could find dog friendly places to eat and visit.  Shop in places where we can exchange holding the dogs while each other pops in.  We'd visit new grocery stores and I imagine that we would take turns doing the shopping according to who was cooking or who had the most things to get.  We'd go back have a "sundowner" lol, and fix dinner.  Then we'd settle down and eat our grilled or stove cooked dinner and we might sit out for a while but we'd probably come in and watch a movie on the RV TV.  And/or read.  George wants to have a good stereo (or way to play music) on there and room for a musical instrument - maybe talking ukelele here, lol.   Anyway, I keep looking at Class C's or the larger vans with more room.  I know that one couple that has a Hymer van ended up joining a gym to take their showers in - and they travel to cities that have a planet fitness, lol.  They do their workouts each morning and take their showers.  They no longer have a dog though.   I want to be able to shower in the van, but that is not a bad thought.  Personally I think it is good to dream through our scenarios because we'll be better prepared when it happens.  We have to think about - how to have enough power to leave the a/c on while we are gone, to have a system where we can check it on our mobile apps (or not) or if we just always only go places where we can take the dogs.  There are lots of things to consider.  But I'd certainly want to have my dogs with me for the trips - we just have to figure out how to handle it properly.  You can leave them in the RV if the temps are ok or if you are able to make sure the a/c can still run.  Anyway, I find myself thinking of these things all the time.
And when I look around the house I think - "we have way too much stuff".   lol

So anyway we ate last night and watched a movie - We started watching Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil with John Cusack.  And I fell asleep at 8:30.  lol  So we didn't finish it.  I've slept really good the last two nights.  George said maybe it was barometric pressure.  I've slept great since I've been on this system, and have been eating nutritious foods and when I don't sleep good it's been when I've eaten something with enriched flour or something that is not good for me. 

Well, I feel bad that I have not done more with the business in the last week or two.  But then when I look back at what I've done over time - I always feel so much better.  I was making myself miserable working all day and then coming home and working every little open minute without time for myself  or to read or to think.  It was making me a grump.  So I know that I can't just do that every night.  I'll get better and more confident as time goes by and I certainly am better when I can plan my week on Sunday for the week ahead.   I'm still working on what the schedule and the routine needs to look like.  I have a lot on the to do list both personal and with the business.    And now we are heading into our "even busier" time of the year with the shopping and all that.  So I'm giving myself a break at beating myself over the head with to do's before I get any down time.  I'm plugging away but have waves of it.  That honestly seems to me to be a good way for me b/c some weeks are busier than others.  This is our busiest time of the year as if the other times of the year are not busy enough!  So I have to be delicate with myself and not beat myself up for not getting more done than I do and for not making more progress.  It's all good though.  I'm so excited about my business and the nutrition.  It's a gold nugget.  I willing to share, and I'm willing to go out and find others like me that want to feel good and meet their dreams too.  But I have to do this at a slow pace b/c there is very little time left in my day.  It's an "on the go" business and I have to work at that.  I'll get better but til I do - I'm not going to beat myself up.  I try to see just how far I've come since March.  I've learned so much, I've turned consultant.  I've met most of my goals.  I always meet my goals and I didn't meet the goals I didn't set.  So perhaps I should be more specific with my goals.  But - we do have a lot on our schedules in the next quarter and a lot of shopping to do.  I will plan and tweek and see what I can get done as I can do it.

Ya'll have a great day.  We are going to church this morning and connect with fellow followers!

Saturday, September 29, 2018

Saturday Morning Talk over Coffee

Wow, I slept til 7 this morning and believe it was 8:30 when I went to bed.  I remember looking forward to going to bed and a long sleep and I did my two sprays of Sleep Support and I was out.  It has melatonin in it.  And it felt so good. 

We have a Walk for Life we are doing today.  It's only 2 miles.  But I decided to do it so we could get some extra exercise for a good cause.  It is a fundraiser event and supports the Pregnancy Care Center which is there for guidance during crises situations.  Also they encourage them to keep the baby instead of going through abortion.  They also provide counseling for those who have had abortions.  I became involved with this group during my days of being on the Mission Team at Gallatin Church of Christ.  We have supported them even after leaving and moving to MJ Town.  We have a friend that runs the center still, from that church.

So last night I came home and was craving pop corn and I fixed a big huge bowl of homemade popped in the coconut oil.  Then I felt bad afterwards.  lol George kept saying, "well, it's a vegetable".  It sure was good though. 

I hooked up my new Isagenix diffusser and we have Rosemary, Lemongrass, and Eucalyptus in there right now.  Smells good this morning. 

Let's see, we heard some news on our 1/4 of a cow.  Since George is working out past Lebanon - he's working in and around some folks that are into farming.  He's been brought fresh eggs and canned goods here and there.   And the latest thing is "who wants to go in on a cow"???  lol

Well of course we are in.  We are getting a 1/4 of a cow.  So we've been trying to eat up the biggest things in the freezer to make room.  We've been eating good lately with ham, roast, and turkey.  lol
Then somebody backed out on their 1/4, so that 1/4 came open and George's sister is going to take that.  We won't get it until November.  And I hope it doesn't fall while we are in Texas b/c we won't be able to get it while we are gone.  I suppose they can hold it for us but I'm not sure.  I'm praying that doesn't happen.  <----I've been trained to plan, and be aware of what can go wrong so it can be prevented ahead of time which I think aids to me being called negative.   But I'm trained that way. lol
It's a survival technique of sorts.  I'm not going to worry over it - but I am going to bring up the question. 

We are very excited about all the cuts of meat we'll get from the cow.  They are going to package it two by two on things like burgers, steaks, and so forth. 

It's an Angus cow.  Matter of fact it's Cow #3.  I haven't seen a picture and I don't want to.  I love animals.  I eat cow all the time but it gets more personal when you give it a number.  If it had a name I'd have to rethink it.  But it's very humbling because I tried to consider how many cows I personally have consumed over the course of my life. I mean each burger or steak or beef stew or roast came from some cow.  What if you could see a line up of all the cows that you ate from?  That would mean even more cows!  And I immediately said a spiritual "thank you" for them feeding me. Even though it wasn't at their will, they still fed me.  The cow died so I could keep living and be sustained. And that made me think of Christ dying on the cross.  A spiritual holy being dying for my spiritual side to continue.  Something clicked.  I always wondered why someone had to die to keep another thing living in the spiritual sense.  I mean God is God so I always wondered why God just couldn't save us without anyone having to sacrifice anything.  I guess the way I was explained it was the blood saves us.  But now that I think of it physically - I can see it more clearly spiritually.  This cow dying - giving it's blood (it's life) for me to be sustained in a physical sense, is much like what Christ did for us in a spiritual sense.  Blood sacrificing for life. 

But wait, we aren't even on to pigs yet.  lol  Just kidding. 

We have such a line up of a list of things to do this weekend.  It makes me want to ignore my list.  lol  But will do the best we can.  At least we have more time this weekend.

Aunt Martha and Uncle Ken made it back home ok. 

My sister and her family are headed to Florida.

My sister in law and brother in law are headed to Hawaii today.

My friends Lisa and Don are on a cruise over into Italy and Greece.

My friends Lisa and Lou are up in Wisconsin. 

George and I are holding down the state of TN I guess as everyone left it.  lol lol lol  I noticed the traffic was very light yesterday.  I guess a lot of places are on fall break.  Hallelujah.  Because the traffic has really been so much worse this year - too many people moving out this way.  It now takes close to an hour to get to work.  I leave at 7 and barely get myself in the door by 8.  It's hard to leave any earlier than that with me doing dog duty! 

Well, better go get my shake fixed so I can do this two mile walk.  It's not far but registration starts in 20 minutes! 

Friday, September 28, 2018

Lowering Cholesterol, Ham and Mac N Cheese, and YOU ARE ENOUGH!

I had ordered the Heart Booster a while back but really just got started using it every day this week.  It has plant sterols in it which is known (scientifically proven) to help Healthy Cholesterol levels.  So that is good.  It's tasteless so it can go into any shake.  

I saw where you can put some of our essential oils into your water.  So I'm going to try that today.  I received my new essential oils and its very sexy looking diffuser.  Gonna crank it up this weekend. 
I love the fact that it lets you know which ones are consumable and which ones can be put on your skin and which ones are just for the diffuser.  

Yesterday was not as hairy as the day before and I was able to get a few things done which made me feel somewhat better.  

And George fixed the most awesome ham last night.  It was similar to Nanny Voss's ham, my grandmother (Mom's Mom). 

And George made some comfort food.  We had these pasta shell things that we needed to use up.  Normally I don't do enriched pasta items anymore.  Has to be whole grain or brown rice/lentil, or some type of veggie or spinach pasta with whole grain.  But I agreed to this.  It was so good.  Ham and mac n cheese! We also had Black Eyed peas with it too.  Loved this meal.  Comfort food!  The ham also had a mustard glaze to it.   

It may not look like much but oh it was so good. 

This one continues her staring at me.  lol  Especially when I have food but even when I don't - she does this.  lol Cracks me up.  She's my little buddy.  She even cuddled with me last night.  She may have gotten cold but when I woke up she was all snuggled against me.  

Soon the doggies will go for their grooming.  Their fur is getting long and it is about time. 

So I have been mentioning the podcasts and how good they are on "The Joy Junkie" - despite the foul mouth.  Yesterday's podcast that impressed me was the one on "You are Enough".  We tend to think because of certain events that our self worth is less than it should be.  Disappointments, events, others issues, others wins -can make us feel that we lack value and worth or that we did something wrong or we are not good enough or it must have been something we did or didn't do.  But the podcast went on to say that YOU are the one that gets to determine your SELF WORTH.  YOU are Enough!  No one else gets to determine that for you.  Powerful stuff.  We do let things get to us and it gives us doubt.  

I have always shied away from self-help, thinking "I was enough" already, lol.  I have always relied on God and myself to get me through.  But, the boundary thing was getting my attention in the last month or two and quite frankly has intrigued me for the last year and I was able to take a look at it back when a family member berated me out of the blue and was trying to figure all that out - was it me, was it her - kinda hit me like a stray ball coming out off the field and wham!  I studied it more from a forgiveness angle but it touched on negativity and how to separate what was my responsibility in the issue and what was hers.  And what I don't have to put up with and drawing the lines and setting the boundaries.  I did a little study back then when all that was going on and it helped me shed a lot of the baggage from that.  I recently came across this again kindof by accident - when a friend was listening to me talk about work and she said "oh my gosh you need to check out the boundary thing".  

So I have in the last week or two been looking in to this and that is how I found Amy Smith's Joy Junkie podcast.  It has a lot of good points.  And it is so very helpful.  When the negative thoughts come, I've been able to shave them off immediately and then my thoughts are not holding me captive.  It is very freeing.  Very exciting stuff.  So I guess the big step in helping yourself and self-care is realizing you need it.  And yesterday's podcast was just really powerful for me at how no one else gets to determine your self worth.  

Some life examples, not necessarily my own, but if the shoe

When everyone else gets a raise and you don't - it does not mean that you are worth less than other people.  
When people don't ever answer your email, it doesn't mean that you are worth nothing.  
When people perceive you to be something you are not - they don't get to determine your worth.  
Now, they may mistreat you and not treat you fairly and misjudge you and misunderstand you or make fun of you or get irritated at you.  But they do not get to determine your value as a person.  
We each get to do that for ourselves.   
But they can't touch what you feel your own self worth is.  They have no control over you, your thoughts, your mind, your abilities unless you let them.  

"Can't touch this!"  lol   Love this.  I'm still learning.  But I have let others sway me or disturb my thinking and I realize that now and I shouldn't let how others treat me determine my self worth or my value as a person.  Shake it off.  Let it go.  Once you realize your self worth great things begin to happen.  ;-) 

So next week I'm gonna have to switch back into some other podcasts I think - to get back into doing some business minded things.  I've had to step back a bit this last week or so just to breathe a bit.  

Last night I set up the Trello App.  Oh my gosh it's the coolest thing.  It's more like a "to do" list or "project" app.  I like the way it works.  I stayed up til 10 last night setting up a few project lists - our bucket list, Texas trip list, and this weekend I'll begin putting my business to do's, business plans, etc on there.  This will be better than my white board b/c I can take it on the go.  Love it.  

Sometimes I think my business building is slow.  And it is.  It takes 3 to 5 years.  But when I look back at all that I have learned and all I have done in building the base - and in learning the processes - I've come a long way really since March.  Especially considering that I have a FT job and so much going on all the time.  

But I'm excited about all of it still and excited about the future.  I have two trips to look forward to also in Texas and then in Phoenix for NYKO (New Year Kick off).  

So I better go so I can get to work!  Ya'll have a great day.  

Sybil, were you able to get this update?  Sybil has lost my blog somehow.  She was only able to get old entries.  I'm wondering if you should clear the cache?  I've been making entries every day. 

Thursday, September 27, 2018

Water on a Duck's Back

I had my greens yesterday.  It looks like iced tea but it's actually greens with my ionix formula in it.  

Today I'll probably have my fruits, or either my grape hydrate.  Not sure which.  

I'm not even going to blog about yesterday.  It's hard to stay positive when you reflect on the day and see so many negativities and issues.  I don't want to cross some line that attracts trolls and would make them sin in their spins of it.  So I'll leave yesterday alone.  

Everyone seems to be out to "expose" or "derail" everyone these days. You really have to be careful.  However, I have decided to just be myself and not worry and if someone spins me wrong, they just do and I will tattle to God and let him tear hold of the situation.  Works pretty good so far.  In the mean time, I see others who get all torn up over it.  I feel bad and try to help them using the podcasts and scripture.  

The podcasts are awesome.  It's helping me to get rid of the negative thoughts and release things you wonder about but don't know.  When your mind starts to go down a path of uncertainty, or trying to zap your confidence, or give you periods of doubt, you can stop the thoughts immediately by asking yourself a few questions.  The devil wants us to be unhappy and the minute we are happy he is looking for ways to tarnish it.  I've always known that.  And he is really trying hard to wreck me this week.  But I know who holds my world.  And the devil and his schemes is not going to wreck my spirit.  It's only making me stronger as I bask in the word of God and these podcasts that tell me "you are enough", "you do matter" and "you are loved".   I can see a difference knowing these things and using these things.  

So I'm letting go of frustrations.  I'm moving toward my goals.  I realize the world is out of control and I won't be able to control it.  But I can control me.  I can be the captor of my own thoughts.  I will be good to myself.  It's not selfish but self-care.  If you don't care for yourself you will never care for others right?  If you don't love yourself, you cannot love others.  

So while the old me would love to dissect yesterday and tear apart this and that and give my judgment on the day - I'll refrain and let it go.  And it wasn't a bad day just busy - but I don't want to attract trolls and so forth.  There's enough of that already, lol. 

But when the negative thoughts come to mind, such as "Oh no, does this mean this?"  Or "So in so didn't speak to me, did I do something wrong?"  Or "Is this person doing this to me on purpose or is it just a fluke?"  All that kind of stuff.  I'm very sensitive and God has given me the abilities to clue in on things - I think some call it "insight".  It can be a good talent or a bad one.  I think I have about a 70 to 80 % accuracy rate on my insight meter.  One can never know for sure b/c you often do not get the reveal to know if you were right or not.  But I get these feelings.  I think that each of them have merit to something but don't always play out to the point my mind takes it.  So I really have decided to stop my analytical mind from speculating and wondering.  That is really what this is all about.  I'll use that energy somewhere else.  I'll let God handle that from now on.  so when the negative talks come - whether it's wondering about something else or bad self talk to myself - like "you are such an idiot" or "they are thinking this about you" - I'm stopping myself there with a few questions.  

"Why are thinking this?" And keep drilling down by asking Why til you get to the root.  You will learn a lot about yourself and your sub psyche is sending you a message that you need to deal with.  You have to figure out what it is.  Yeah normally there is not enough thought space in the day to be able to think beyond much of anything because the next interruption is happening.  So when I say sometimes that I was so busy to have my own thoughts - that is often true.  I get in my car and realize - Wow - I can have a thought of my own now!  lol  Sometimes it even catches me off guard.  Then I'll get home and George will say "did you give thought to this or that?"  Ummmm, no - I don't get to really have many thoughts of my own during the day.  lol 

Anyway, I listened to an app this morning that sends a little "video" link to my mail.  This mornings is:  You are Called to Holiness

You can click the link there above and check it out.  This comes from downloading the app "Abide" and it is really good - this is the free one.  It's very helpful.  It will give you a 3 min meditation (devo) and a prayer.  The voice is soothing.  It's also good to do at night.  I've done it at lunch before too when I just needed to release a few things. 

So Yay, I got through today without being negative.  When the world around you IS negative, it's really hard not to spout off about it.  After all, this blog is a journaling of what happened to me yesterday.  It's kinda sad not to be able to share it - bad or good.  But for the sake of the trolls and it leading others to sin with their spin - and for the sake of me wanting to be positive - I won't talk about the negativity I'm around a lot.  Instead I'm gonna let it roll off like water on a duck's back. 

Wednesday, September 26, 2018

Tugie, Maisy, and "Whatever"

Here's Ms. Tugie.  Lately Maisy and Roger have been getting all the attention.  Tugie needs some.  She is a sweet old girl.  17 and rapidly heading to 18 as best as I can count.  We are going to have to give her some benedryl as she itches and scratches but I need to check and make sure it won't interfere with her heart meds.  Bless her.  

It cracks me up when I'm watching my shows and look over and she is staring at me and watching me just like I am her TV.  lol  

She is a sweet girl too.  Follows me everywhere.  We are buddies.  

Well yesterday was an ok day.  The realms of the devil tried everything he could to upset my day yesterday but he could not upset me.   I flicked my own intended schedule into the sunset and assumed a schedule that had originally been assigned to two others but finally fell to me. 

 So what? My agenda for the day was pretty much blown.  The devil did accomplish that - which really impacts other people instead of me because I was less available and needs that others have from me are now on a waiting list for a bit longer.

I will admit to feeling a tiny bit exasperated and much like a feather in the wind.  But I had a great day despite it. Just rolled my eyes at it and said "whatever".  And was able to get away from the norm of the day and make it a good one.  

 Like I said it's really everyone else that will suffer and wait on things with me being behind.  So now the delay is 1 day longer.  So be it. 

Anyway I'm as behind as a turtle on a hot summer's day on a country road behind a huge tractor of hay.  But that is ok.  It is what it is.  If I can be patient with the process, so can everyone else. Right now, they have no choice. ;-)

And then the day was over in a blink.  And I came home and we talked to Katy and George fixed a beef pot roast with carrots and taters.  I watched my You Tube shows:  Keep Your Daydream, Gone with the Wynns, and Have Wind Will Travel. 

Then it was time for bed. 

Lots of rain around the last few days.  Our grass is huge but there has been no opportunity for George to mow as it's been wet or raining when we have been home. 

I did not do the team call last night.  We were eating late.  It's very hard to do the team calls and fit them in.  I also wanted to finish watching my shows.  So I'm still trying to get the down time from the weekend that I didn't get as we were so busy and gone the whole weekend.  I have to have a bit of down time or I will combust.  So it was nice to have that. 

Well today I have a goal of booking our hotel in Hot Springs on both ends of our Texas trip.  I've not had time to do that yet but need to get on it. 

Lisa J and I have been discussing the Phoenix trip some.  They were going, then not going, and now I think they are going again.  So I am relieved.  I want to go but don't really care to go by myself.  I don't think I'd have as much fun that way. 

Anyway, need to get off and get ready and go to work.  Much to do.  Obviously.  Ya'll have a good Wednesday.  At noon we'll be sliding into the weekend.  George and I are doing a Walk for Life this weekend as part of my trying to incorporate exercise into my life.  It's a fundraiser event for Crisis Pregnancy Care Center so we'll hit two birds with one stone.  I hate that phrase, but you know what I mean anyway. lol

So here's to the day...hold those coffee cups up high..."cheers". 

Tuesday, September 25, 2018

Eerie Full Moon, The Joy Junkie, and The Tourist

Strange and eerie weather outside this morning.  And apparently a full moon.  And you can see the results of it too.  Chaos.  

Yesterday was ok for a Monday.  A bit interruptive and all schedules are off for the week - not much going like it's supposed to.  

Usually I would care. But I think it's easier just to let go and be a feather in the wind than to fight it.  Just tell me what time and where to show up.  Meanwhile as I work on other's agendas, my own desk piles up even higher and everyone sits and waits for their thing they need from me -  while I go knock my head up against a few walls for a while.   lol   At least my sense of humor is still hanging on. What on earth would I do without it.  

Have been spending my time this week in the Podcast of Joy Junkie.  I think some things are getting through.  Much of my life I've let what I thought others were thinking, and others motives, bother me, shape me, and take up my thoughts.  Being in control of my environment is a learned behavior that I developed naturally I think as I modeled behavior that I was familiar with - as I encountered life emerging from the nest.  It's protectiveness has done well for me in many cases and in some cases not.   I've learned I can indeed control a lot of my environment.  After all we do have some rights as an individual and our minds naturally make us do actions that lead toward the visions we have in creating the environment we want and need.  But what we can't control is what other people are thinking - well yeah in some respects you can sway people, but really it IS their own thinking.  You have no real power to be able to manage a person's thoughts completely.  Nor do I want to.  But what you can do is keep whatever it is you THINK they are thinking from harming you by establishing boundaries with yourself and with others. 

 This is a new way of thinking with me and it really helped me yesterday work through some things.  It amazes me that at 55 I'm still learning about myself and about people.  Being in HR and seeing so many negative sides to people for 30 years can really impact your view on society as a whole because your experience and background become a bank of experiences or statistics for various scenarios in which a large percent has been negative because of the job I do in handing negative issues.  I don't often get to see the good side of things as they happen.  I'm usually by nature of my position handling things on the negative side.  It kinda makes you jaded and gives you an extra sense about what people are thinking or what is happening.  And then our minds react to that.  Sometimes you are right and sometimes you are wrong.  But I think it's given me a shadow.  So I'm trying to view a new perspective on things.  

Recently I said something in a group of people and someone laughed and looked at another person, and I took it as they were making fun of me. I didn't act like I acknowledged it.  Maybe they were and maybe the weren't making fun of me.  Maybe their timing was off and they were laughing at something I totally missed.   I feel 95% right though as there did not appear to be any other thing that occurred that they would be laughing about.  I brought it up to George later and he criticized me for thinking that. He said I didn't know what they were thinking and that was crazy to think such a thing.  I kinda shut down.  It made me mad.  I'm trying to figure out why.  I wanted to discuss with George my feelings about it and see what he thought.  I was seeking to be consoled.  I was seeking strength.  But I was scolded instead and called crazy.  

I've been replaying all this in the last day trying to figure out the whole lot of it.  But I'm proud to say that it really doesn't matter what anyone thinks.  It's hurtful when you THINK someone is making fun of you.  It's hurtful when you go to talk to someone and they reprimand you instead.  I am then reminded why I often don't talk anymore.  Sometimes it's easier to just put up walls and be by yourself.  You seek help and basically get verbally slapped in the face for asking.  If you were to ask George though he'll tell you a different version.  He'll think he said nothing wrong.  He'll think I'm the problem. I don't know how fix things like this so I just shut down.  I told him "this is why I never open up to you".  

The Joy Junkie, although very foul mouthed at times, seems to have a good perspective on "being your best self" as it goes with relationships with others.  I have a hard time sometimes being able to communicate with those that are critical, brazen, crass, and a know it all, and especially people that want to tell me what it is that I am thinking, or that think they know what my motives are when they don't even have a clue.  I tend to be overwhelmed with that and shut down.  Not that George is all those things.  But I know some folk who are.  You know that feeling?  When your brain is trying to analyze what is happening in a conversation and it's too much to internalize and so you just SHUT DOWN?  I'm not sure what the process is that happens that makes you shut down but I think it's too many things at once trying to be analyzed and too many emotions wrapped around it.  You feel anger, confusion, and jumbled and so much so you just have to shut down or walk away.

But the Joy Junkie helps you establish some boundaries so that you can get what you need from others and stop the behaviors that you do not want.  I need to get good at delivering the message.  The tone needs to comes across better.  She suggested something like this: 

Tell the other person when you have a problem - not to try to fix the person or the problem but let them know what you need from them.  Or tell  your spouse "when I have a problem I need you to say ' How can I help you with this situation?' and I'll let you know what I need from you."  In other words, don't try to fix it, I may just need you to listen until I ask your opinion.  

Me:  Blah Blah Blah situation.  Pain, hurt feelings, blah blah. 
Other person:  How can I help you in this situation? 
Me:  I just need to vent. 
Other Person:  Ok vent away.  

Or you might say 
Me:  I just need your opinion on the matter

Me:  Tell me how to handle this person 

Me:  Tell me what I did wrong in this situation.  

Then everyone is receptive and on board with what needs to be said and received. 
Does that make sense?  If I'm asking for a critique on my thinking, I'll be ready to receive it.  

So I probably need to lay a few communication boundaries with George.  He may need to lay a few with me.  But there is a way to say it or we'll both shut down.  We actually DID both shut down recently over this.  I'm still dealing with it.  I'm still trying to verbalize what the actual conversation of laying the boundary looks like.  But I don't take criticism very well.  He will say he wasn't criticizing me but giving me advice.  So I should probably say "no advice given unless I ask for it".   

He'll probably not like me giving him a boundary, but we all have needs and rights and know how we need to be treated and if that is the way we need to communicate fairly to have a decent conversation, then it's kinda necessary.  I'm still very green on all this stuff.  Sometimes it seems likes its selfish to have a boundary.  But it's been capped off as "self-care" so that others thoughts and actions do not harm you.  And we can keep ourselves from being negative and having negative thoughts, and have our own thoughts heard and not silenced.  

And that is enough psycho babble for the day.  I know just enough to  be dangerous at this point.  But I'm really enjoying the learning on it.

And here is the Kate Bug - Spirit week still going on.  She is dressed as a tourist today.  I thought she was representing Alfred Hitchcock movie though.  Til I realized that would not be appropriate for 1st grade.  lol 

Anyway, off to work and being a feather in the wind.  I keep thinking I'm Jonah today.  I think I have to go to Ninevah.  If I don't go I'll be eaten by a whale.  So off I go.

Coming off of a cleanse day today...look out!  ;-) 

Monday, September 24, 2018

Church and a Quick Trip Home

Well we went to church yesterday.  We took cheese and crackers and summer sausage slices.  All dishes were eaten clean with the exception of a few crackers.  There was a good spread yesterday!  

Our friends Kathy and Richard had an emergency in the family and had to leave.  Had me really worried, but I think everything will be fine.  Our class was talking on worrying when that happened during class and I began worrying again - not that you could do anything about it but I was hoping everything was fine and began visiting various scenarios of awful til finally we heard what was wrong and all looked like it would be fine as another family member had been ill suddenly but taken care of.  

So we came home and changed, took dogs out and George started watching the Titans game while I got ready to go. I was wondering if I'd be able to tear him away. But he listened in the car.  I drove b/c I like the way I drive in the rain.  The day before, George drove too fast for me in the rain.  He usually doesn't drive fast in the rain but for some reason he did Saturday and it hasn't rained in a while on oily pavement is not always a good thing.  So I drove to Columbia since he scared me the day before.  He drove back though.  It wasn't raining as much. ;-) 

So we arrived at 2:00 as promised and sat around and talked and watched Life Time channel, Mom's favorite channel.  

Here's Coco - my Aunt Martha's dog.  Isn't she sweet?  

I asked what our eating schedule was.  I wasn't sure if it was 5 or 7 or just whenever everyone got hungry.  I didn't know what the plan was.  So she called my sister since she was meeting us.  And Mom decided that we would eat right then.  So we left and went to the Mexican restaurant, El Fuentez.  Here is Uncle Ken and Aunt Martha.   We did not take the dogs this trip b/c we thought it would be too much to have 5 dogs in one room and leave them.  Maisy gets kinda picky and barks and sometimes does not get along with others well, so we decided if we were going out to leave them home.  It sure made the trip easier it seemed. 

And Mom.  I love all the fancy lighting at this place.  

I had them take our picture.  

Uncle Ken with Coco. 

All piled up in the living room.  

Uncle Ken was really explaining something below.  But I was taking a pic of Fancy, Mom's dog.  

We went home after stopping to taste craft Beer and Columbia's brewery, Asgard Brewery.  We have been wanting to try it.  So since we didn't have the doggies we decided it was a good time to try it. 

Aunt Martha bought some essential oils from me.  As did George yesterday.  lol He agreed to let me enroll him too.  I decided to order the complete Experience pak with the diffuser and all.  Aunt Martha bought that one too.  I'm excited!  

Here is Miss Maisy girl at bed time.  She loves me so and it struck me how lucky I am to have a doggie that thinks so much of me.  Lord knows it's hard to find people that do. 

Despite our busy-ness, I'm about to cycle again.  And I was able to get the Essential Oil pack with my bonuses so far.  At least I was able to get all set up this weekend.  Having the essential oil kit will help me to be able to sell it.  You can use some of it orally, some of it with the coconut oil carrier with your skin, and then diffuse it.  So I'm very excited to get mine in. 

Then on the way home friend Lisa J texted that they would not be going to NYKO in Phoenix in January.  I was crushed.  I'm undecided now about myself.  I just don't know.  I don't really want to go by myself.  We'll see.  It's such good information.  And I loved the experience last time.  I hate to miss it.  But we'll see.

Anyway, I didn't really get much of a chance to breathe and plan for the week on this busy weekend.  I didn't really get my day to get things done at home.   But, when we got home I vacuumed at least so I would not be in a bad mood this morning.  I didn't have time last weekend so I was determined.  I did more laundry this morning.

So it's cleanse day today!  Washing away the sins of the weekend.  I really wasn't too bad. I had a few cheats but the other meals of the day were low cal, and a bit of protein.  So I was held over good.

Ya'll have a fab Monday.  I'm going for more coffee.  Yes you can have coffee on a cleanse day.

Oh and we prayed for George's job situation in class, prompted by me.  George did not seem to think he needed prayer - well he said God already had it.  So I told them they could pray for me instead if he didn't need prayer - every one laughed.  See I can be funny when I want to be.  lol  Anyway on the way to Columbia an old friend/coworker from Gibson that works somewhere else now asked George if he would be willing to work for their company (to interview) but he'd have to travel to Minnesota once per month.  He'll check into today.  He would work from home the rest of the time.
It's a purchasing position.

Anyway, we'll see what happens with that.  He'll check into it.  The mine seems to not want to talk about bringing him on any more but they say they want to keep him as long as they can.  It's not really fair to him (nor us) to not allow him to have benefits and vacation time and holiday time.  We haven't had a vacation together in forever.  I know we'll get one at Thanksgiving.  And I'm probably just going to start planning one anyway for next year because at what point do you say enough of this temp stuff?   I'm ready to plan our life.  lol  We can't do anything for having to wait and see, wait and see, wait and see.

Anyway, I better get to my permanent job before I lose mine too.

Sunday, September 23, 2018

Roger Dog, A Busy Saturday, Rain Arrived, and a Quick Bargain Hunt

Busy little day yesterday.  But enjoyed what little time we had home.  You know I love being home about as well as going places.  I did the blog and a couple of loads of laundry, packed the cleaning pack for Monday and my snack bag/drink bag of goodies for the week with my IsaGoodies. 

 I also worked at my desk some as I had to figure out my IsaWallet.  I had to activate the card, which I thought I had done.  I think I activated my IsagenixWallet account instead.  You have to activate both and then I tried to use the userID of my Isagenix account to go with it instead of another one I was supposed to use - so I had confused myself as I thought it was all connected.  It kinda is but has a separate signon.  All squared away now. I decided that I would spend it back into the business and what I decided to do for now that would be the most beneficial is to buy the complete set of essential oils and get the diffuser that comes with the set.  Then I can have it to use and to show and I will have it by the party time.  Lisa reminded me of a grand idea.  I will go in and have George as a new customer and he will order the oils!  ;-)  I get more credit that way.  Woo Hoo!   So I'll do that today.  I think I get free shipping with a code too if I do it today.

Roger says hello.  He enjoyed a lazy cloudy sun room morning.  I almost shut him up in the room b/c I didn't realize he was up there.  Bless his heart.  Once it got close to noon it was a bit hot in there since the rain did not come til later.

Roger is a sweet heart of a cuddle button.  I like to hug him when I need a hug myself.  Because he'll let ya.  He is not usually a lap dog though but he will let you if you need one. 

We went to the store around Noon at Publix and bought grits and cheese so George could make his cheese grits for a pot luck dinner.  We also bought what we needed for the cheese and summer sausage and cracker tray we are taking to church. 

Then we went back and I did some ironing and actually I think that is when I worked on the IsaWallet thing.  I worked in the house some, but not as much as I'd have liked. 

We left around 5 and drove in some pretty heavy rain and went to Nashville and turned north to Hendersonville TN and we got there way too early so we stopped and shopped at a Bargain Hunt.  Just as I got into it, we had to leave.  But not before I bought a $20 black heavy wool pant coat for winter.  It's perfect for what I need.  I did not have a short heavy coat for really cold winter days.  We don't have too many but this will be perfect for that.  It looks really nice.  

Here the skies unleashed on us as we headed out yesterday.  

I didn't get any pics of our friend's shower.  We just all enjoyed ourselves.  The pot luck was fabulous.  

I saw my friend that signed up for our nutrition system there, and she said she had lost 7 lbs already.  So proud of her for doing this.  She feels great and said that she was able to do so much more yesterday than if she had not been on the system.  I love hearing that and it makes me feel so happy to be able to have others get the nutrition and see for themselves what it does.  Our food supplies are not adequate out there and our bodies are going into all kinds of autoimmune diseases because we do not get what we need and crave.  I'm just so excited.  People think it's just another shake company but it's real natural ingredients you are putting in your body.  No one believes it really til they experience it.  And that is ok.  Everyone has to do what they want and I don't hold any hard feelings at all.  I just know what I know and when people are ready, like I was, they will do and see!  

Anyway that made me feel so good to hear her good news.  Her body began reacting immediately.  

Speaking of - I need to get my make up on so we can head out to church this morning.  Another big day planned ahead with family.  Looking forward to seeing my Aunt and Uncle from Jacksonville!  

Saturday, September 22, 2018

Anniversary Continues with BORNS concert, and Seafood Dinner at Fin and Pearl

Friday was a great day - went by fast.  I had this for lunch and it was really good!  Needed a little more protein.

Just a pic of the Gulch area.  We ate at Fin and Pearl.  I was thinking the prices were reasonable but I must have been looking at the lunch menu.  Everything I wanted had a price tag.  Here was the place below coming around the corner from where we parked.   

Fin and Pearl, 12th Ave, Nashville

Fresh Ceviche, Fin and Pearl, Nashville
 George got the Ceviche Salad and I had the one below.
Crab, avacdo, mango salad with dijon mustard vinaigrette dressing
 Strangely a stray shrimp cocktail made its way to our table with confidence and hurried off.  lol  I said to George "Did you order that?"  He said "no we didn't order one? But we'll let that be our anniversary present."  A manager soon came over.  Not sure if he noticed our confusion or if someone had discovered the shrimp cocktail delivered to our table.  I told the manager that we wanted him to know that someone brought us that but we didn't order it - we like it but just wanted them to know.  George said "how did you all know it was our anniversary?"  He started to take it but said "well it's already been set on your table so you can keep it if you like shrimp cocktail and we typically do a free dessert for anniversary.  So you will get that too."  Swwwweeeeet.

Shrimp Cocktail, with a very special cocktail sauce, Fin and Pearl, Nashville
 I got the scallops dish with potato cakes and Brussels sprouts.
Scallops, potato cakes and brussel sprouts, Fin and Pearl, Nashville
 The waiter, who looked like Cody, our son in law, lol...suggested either the peanut butter cheesecake or the Angel Fish Cake.  We got the Angel Fish.
Angel Fish cake, Fin and Pearl, Nashville, TN
 The bill was brought inside this book.  Is that not cool?  lol

Sign inside the restaurant.  

George photo bombing the pic. 

Twin Shadow opened for the Borns concert we went to. 

They had a good sound.

I took this between sets, so many were getting refreshments.  But there was a packed house inside the Ryman in Nashville. 

Ryman Auditorium, Nashville

Interesting that he had qualities of Elton John (even played one of his songs).  He had qualities of Mick Jagger, Elton John, David Bowie, and Michael Jackson.  I looked at his Concert info on one website (perhaps Stubhub) and his tickets were sold out along the West coast.  

I took these below mainly to show the fans.  Those below and all around knew the words to most every song.  George and I were really impressed.  So was Borns.  He said he must be dreaming to play at the Ryman.  And he teasingly told the audience it was a little intimidating singing with such good harmonies out there.  

It was a very colorful, entertaining concert.  Very different from what we normally go to.  I loved it.  I think George enjoyed it to from a musical appreciation side.  I will say that my favorite was the Elton John he did and I hate to say it, but he did a better job than Elton - lol  It sounded sooooooooo good.  If Elton has not been to his concert - he should go.  He would love him.  I bet he has! 

Anyway, fun evening and we slept until six something.  

Better get on with my day.  I don't have a lot of time this weekend.  Much going on.  We have a couples wedding shower tonight, church in the morning and we are taking food.  We will come home, take the dogs out, change, and then head to Columbia to eat with Mom and my Aunt Martha and Uncle Ken.  And then back home.  Then work on Monday.  Again..  It all goes by fast. 

I obtained another customer yesterday too.  A coworker was interested so I enrolled her at lunch time.  She was excited and I was too!  My friend Lisa said I only needed one more person to enroll and I get free vitamins.  ;-)  Cool. 

Well I think the to do list is all the normal Saturday doings - getting ready for the next work week, cleaning and such.  I do need to open my IsaWallet card and figure out what I do next.  I need to get our Hot Springs hotel booked.  Need to do a lot of things.  

But it's been a great week.  A lot of fun.  A great anniversary week.  And now time to focus on the business a bit this upcoming week as much as I can.  Fitting it into nooks and crannies and it is literally paying off.  

Well ya'll be good!  Off to see what all I can get done and the first of that is to get some more coffee!  George made it this morning! He got up before me and that is rare.  He took dogs out and fed them and made coffee!  

Have a good one!