It makes me chuckle sometimes getting my office set up for the day with all my needs handy. Favorite pen, fob to get in and out of the office, cleansing wipe for glasses, vitamin pack, essential oils in case I need to de-stress the office, TrueLemon mix for my water, Ionix stress formula, my greens to mix with water, a little snack, a Yeti cup to fill with ice and water for sipping, a strawberry shake, an e+ shot for the late afternoon pick me up, my fat burning pill at lunch time (has cinnamon, pepper, and other natural ingredients), and my "product B" vitamin which is supposed to help with aging by repairing the telemores/DNA within, a little 5 minute journal/devo, my work calendar, and my personal calendar.
I always keep my personal calendar at work with me b/c inevitably George or someone will give me a date for something that is going to happen and I need to write it down. I also have a system of writing down things that I want to do in the evening when I get home, or things to check on or look up or follow up on. I also have a section of my weekly calendar where I write down things I need to order.
I realized yesterday just how much of a Geek I am at trying to be organized with my life. Always the one that has to have a "system", a "checklist", a "method", an "app", the right tools, the right calendar, and the right environment and the right look. God created us all with certain talents and functionality. I don't know that I've done well at using my gifts for the right places. But I guess it's worked well enough.
I really like setting and having a routine, but then again I'm all about doing things differently sometimes and breaking the routines for changes. There are some things that I do not like to change and some preferences that I suppose I will always cling to and most of those are related to the morning routine and also those that stem around the totality of what is going to impact my time as a whole. I have always panicked when I felt things were hugely going to choke my time. I like to get the required things done and panick when I realize I won't have an opportunity. That means having to ignore someone's need for a while, or be questioned about why something was not done timely and I don't have positive emotions built around those things. I'm not sure what it is I'm afraid of. I think that in the past maybe people have not handled that well with me, and then it made me become defensive. I've tried very hard not to be defensive b/c then it makes you look guilty when you are not. And then it makes me bitter and resentful and then mad and angry or all of that at once or in various orders, lol. And then I have to work through THAT. So it's best just be protective of your time. Everyone has their opinions of you - good or bad - probably either way they are wrong, lol. No one really knows but people have a tendency to think the worst of you if you DON'T get THEIR thing done first. I probably do the same. I mean what are you supposed to think if someone ignores your very existence? It doesn't leave a very positive feeling, I can assure you. So I try very hard to answer every email, every need, make every appointment timely, and so forth. And it's a challenge.
I had no idea I'd be talking about being organized and then protective of my time this morning. That is what I love about blogging. It just pushes up from the inside somewhere.
But I have found this week, that I have been very content. Why some weeks are better than others I'm not sure. I have my ideas. I don't want to list them b/c sometimes when I do it seems I jinx things or set myself up. But there are a few things that will set me off like no other. And I'm not settled until it is back to normal. And I've had to learn to combat those types of things by learning boundary setting, unhooking (which is basically a way of not caring - that sounds harsh but it's telling yourself you can't control it so let go). And then focusing on God, and Good Things, and getting exercise to burn the stress, or mindfulness to focus on one thing at a time, or meditation, or breathing. It's a shame we live in such a tightly stress filled life that we even have to have these things present. Sometimes it's just overwhelming to the point of frustration the responsibility you have just in work alone and then you get off of work and there are others that need you and expect from you and your just about spent by the time you arrive home at 6 ish pm. But yet you go - working on the household chores, time with spouse, personal goals, friends, family, pets, parents.
Anyway, all these things - organization, being equipped for the day - either physically or mentally or emotionally - it takes time to get a balance, and time to make things right and fit. Just when you think you have it figured out, you don't. But we don't stop trying.
And that is why I love my weekends so much. I don't have to try so hard. I can rest for a moment and build myself up for another week and catch up on things behind.
So it's Thursday and tomorrow's Friday and as of right now life feels in control and I'm content. It doesn't take much to topple the whole thing down though. lol
So here's to being organized at everything in life, so that something - ANYTHING - has a chance of getting done! And Lord please give us patience with those who are just a feather in the wind that expect us to be responsible for them too. And that is another blog entry entirely. And one I definitely will not DO HERE. ;-)